The Saga starts: Episode One: The Gay Menace

In a galaxy far far away, in a time long, long ago, there was a road runner, and he was a fucking queer! Due to this mother fucking retard I was unable to access my hotmail, which is probably overloaded with junk mail right about now. Damn road runner with its glitch. The entire internet has been gay tonight. Not only have I not been able to access anything related to or retaining the word Microsoft, but the blog wasn't working this evening either ( by this evening I mean last evening, since it's 1:14 right now). I am also having problems with columbia's PHP script engine, that thing is fucking outdated like hell...